Reasons why couples have relationship problems

Relationship Problems – Couples

Nearly every relationship will go through a difficult patch. Although as a couple you are two people, you are also individuals with very distinct personalities and there will come a moment when one personality will clash with the other. Typically this can happen over trivial matters which then lead to tensions and arguments.

Just because you have the odd disagreement or falling out over something like a bad habit or lack of thought doesn’t mean that your relationship is doomed. Even a successful and healthy relationship is bound to have the odd rough patch but what separates those couples who survive and become closer to those who grow apart is how you both address and correct your relationship problems.

Common couples relationship problems

If you’ve recently split with your partner or you are in a relationship that is having problems you will probably be giving plenty of thought as to why you broke up or how you can fix things if you’re still together. Here are the most common reasons for couples relationship problems.

Lack of trust – Trust is one of the most vital factors in a healthy relationship. If you don’t completely trust your partner, and vice versa, it’s a sure sign you are not opening up to the relationship and living your life as a couple rather than as an individual. That feeling of being ‘distant’ from your partner is a good sign that you probably don’t know each other anymore and there isn’t a strong trusting bond keeping you together.

Self-esteem – When you’re in a relationship it’s important to feel good about yourself but that can be difficult if you’re still carrying resentment from a previous relationship that left you with low self-esteem. Carrying this feeling of low self-worth into a new relationship will cause problems with a new partner and ultimately lead to a split.

Jealousy – Feeling jealous is a normal part of being human but when that jealousy becomes excessive and irrational it leads to a doomed relationship with a partner. Excessive jealousy can trigger acts of physical and psychological harm on a partner and unless it is discussed with a professional such as counsellor then it is likely the relationship will not survive.

Helping relationship problems

The majority of couples will find communicating with each other in a better way and making your feelings known can help you both work through your differences. However, for some this can be the most difficult part and they look for a quick fix such as going out for a romantic dinner or giving each other gifts.

These gestures, no matter how grand, will not fix the underlying problems that exist in your relationship. Unless you can communicate on a higher level with each other and understand that you are both individuals with specific needs but also need to be sensitive to the needs of each other, you will not resolve anything.

Sometimes working through your difference requires the intervention of a professional such as a counsellor or psychotherapist. Sessions can be beneficial for you individually or as couple but having an impartial, non-judgemental environment in which to talk can play a vital role in overcoming your issues.

Personal Trainer directoryAbout The Author

GoToSee provide a nationwide directory for therapists who can help with relationship problems.

Use our ‘find a practitioner‘ search facility to locate a therapist in your area.


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